Efron has a nice derriere but Dirty Grandpa's a sordid affair
DIRTY GRANDPA (R21)
Comedy/102 minutes/Opens today
Recently widowed Dick Kelly (Robert de Niro) tricks his straight-laced lawyer grandson Jason (Zac Efron) into driving him to Florida for spring break. What follows is a road trip neither of them will forget, as the raunchy senior is determined to be as perverted as possible.
NOT even the sight of Efron's bare buns can save this movie.
No doubt they are very toned buns, matched by his flawless abs, pecs and cherubic face.
But they are just not worth the trouble of sitting through this poor excuse of a film.
I've enjoyed Efron's post-High School Musical movies, such as 17 Again, because he has an easy boy-next-door charm. But his Jason is a real stick-in-the-mud who rattles on about LLP agreements and worries about wrinkling his khakis.
If I met a guy like him in real life, I might actually kick him in the rear, no matter how luscious it is.
It's also a shame that a veteran actor like de Niro is reduced to playing such a dumbed-down character.
I cringed when he had to yell lines like "Party till you're pregnant!" and dry-humped everything in sight.
De Niro deserves a lot better and, for that matter, so does Efron.
Women watching this will suffer even more because of the terrible sexism at play. The female characters are either virgins or whores, and at no point do you actually feel like they are living, breathing human beings. Just bodies to model bikinis and squirt sunblock on.
Spring-break movies are shallow by definition but they can be light-hearted and funny too.
This is just lame and painful.
THE NEW PAPER